Last April, due to some crazy circumstances, I pulled my daughter from the dance studio where she had been dancing since she was 5.  It was a turbulent time.  Later that week, I posted the following on Facebook

"Everything happens for a reason.  G will no longer be dancing with her current dance company.  I believe there are great things in her future and can't wait to get started down that road.  Best of luck to the rest of the company as they finish their season."

There was nothing derogatory about my post.   Just an informative selection so that friends and relatives from out of town/state would know that there would be no more competitions or recitals for that year.  There was a response from a relative of one of the dancers from that company that did not sit well with me.  I let it go at the time because I did not want emotions to play any part in my response.  But it has bothered me for the better part of a year.  The response I got was this

"What's amazing is 'insert name of company' got her to where she is today"

I probably should let it go, but for some reason I feel that I need to get it off my chest.  To insinuate that one person or organization makes a person what they are is just ignorant.  Disclaimer:  This was not the view of that organization or its employees. 

Certainly all the teachers who have worked with her have been instrumental in making her the dancer she is today.  But did they do it singe handed?   Did they get her to where she was all by themselves?  Is the dancer she was last April the dancer that she really wants to be. 

I have put a lot of time and energy into my daughter's dance education.  I cannot even begin to calculate the hours I have logged driving to and from class, extra rehearsals, competitions, photo shoots, recitals, and social events that revolve around dance.  I have encouraged her when she needed it, pushed her when she needed it and wiped her tears when she needed it.  I have fought with her to go to class when she didn't feel like it or to take an extra class that she didn't want to take because I knew it would make her a better dancer.  I have made hard decisions and been the bad guy because I wasn't a "cool mom" like some of her friends' parents who allowed their dancers to miss class because they didn't feel like going or they "had too much homework."  Why did I do this?  To get her to become a better dancer and to "get her where she is." 

Let's talk about the other commitment..... the financial commitment.  Without my commitment to fund her dance education, she would not be the dancer she is today.  I am talking about $600/month of dance tuition in addition to $1,200 a year in costumes plus entry fees, extra rehearsals, music, spirit wear, etc, etc, etc,  Without this commitment, she wouldn't be the dancer she is today.  I could have spent my money any where.  I choose to spend my money to fund her passion for dance.

Her teacher's commitment to her and my commitment to her would be nothing without her commitment.  It was clear fairly early on that not only did she love dance, but that she had a natural affinity for it.  But that would have gotten her no where with her hard work and drive.  One story that speaks highly of this commitment and drive is story of her broken arm.

When she was just 10 years old, G broke both bones in her lower arm attempting an aerial at dance.  That was on a Wednesday.  She would have to be in a cast/splint for ten weeks.  She was back to dance on Monday in a cast that went from her upper arm and over her wrist.   She would be unable to straighten her arm.  I believe a lot of kids would have sat the rest of the season out.  That wasn't even a discussion in our house.  Her teachers were amazing in encouraging her and re-choreographing dances to work with her broken arm.  Her drive not only allowed her to continue to dance, but to continue to excel.  At Nationals that year, she brought home a National Championship for soloists 9-10.   Great choreography along with her drive got her there. 

So needless to say G did not get where she is as a dancer alone. Her teachers didn't get her there alone.  I didn't get her there alone.  It was a team effort.  One wouldn't have worked without the other. 

So now let's talk about where she was as a dancer.  She had learned a lot, she had been successful in competition, and she was advancing in levels at her studio.  So was she where she wanted to be?  She probably thought she was, but I was beginning to see a different attitude in her.  While I feel she had more to learn from her teachers at the studio, the learning environment wasn't conducive to the education she needed.   She was becoming complacent.  

This complacency might have come from being too comfortable with her situation  Her teachers informed me that she was becoming lazy.  She rarely missed a class.  But if she was lazy, then she wasn't getting everything out of the classes.  She was giving minimum effort.  By seeking out other teachers and classes, I was hoping to reignite her passion for dance.  She wasn't where I wanted her to be. I was giving too much of a commitment for her to be complacent.   

I hold nothing against her former studio.  It was the right place for her right then.  Her teachers gave her what she needed, and she thrived there.   But what is right for one person at a given time, isn't right for everyone or even right for that same person at a different time. 

She's doing something completely different this year.  She is definitely pushing herself.  I see her marking choreography in the back of the room while waiting her turn to perform.  She puts in extra practice on her competition dances.    She is being pushed by other dancers at the studios where she takes classes.  I like to believe she is growing in her ability.   I do know that she has learned to love dance again.  Different teachers, different styles, different studios, different experiences.  Her education will continue to be a team effort...... building on everything her former teachers have taught her, what her current teachers are giving her, my commitment and her drive.